Spread Kind Words, suicidal people exist

Suicide.

What’s suicide? How does this work?

Several people will never understand how it feels to be locked up in your head, tortured by angry demons, who rages and rages at you. You perceive only the bad. What’s your future like? Is there a future for you?


Wait. . .

Aren’t we all going to die anyway? Whether I die now, abi I die later. All die na die. What’s the essence of being alive? What’s the need to live? What’s life actually about?

Why isn’t there a manual for this bullshit we call living? Will it get better for me? Can I peek a little at my future and know if it is worth the wait?


Oh, god! I understand it. I have been there. I watch, read comments and status, listen to people make unruly remarks about suicidial people and those who crossed over because they are unable to bore the heat in the kitchen. Comments and posts so dangerous, they will make a suicidal person go ahead with their intentions. People aren’t kind☹️.

A friend once told me, you just have to think about positive things. Write down 5 things you are grateful for. Oh it is that easy? I can scramble 5 things about the day and feel happy? Is it so easy for me to just to write even ONE thing I am grateful for?

A friend once posted a video mimicking how motivational speakers and society talk. Few of them stated, are you depressed? Don’t be depressed. Are you sad? Be happy!

Oh how easy it is for those who had never experience suicidal thoughts before.

What they don’t understand is;

Suicide makes you not see anything positive in your life. There will be nothing good about you to you. It is just a dark fog. Shadows everywhere. You raise your hands and voice for help, but you are drowned by doubt. The only light is outside. The relief of dead.

Mental health issues is REAL. You are in luck, if you had never suffered from any before. However, I beg you, please be kind.

People who post about wanting to commit suicide aren’t seeking attention.


A boy posted about committing suicide in Rivers State. Suddenly everybody became bothered, lol😾. “Why didn’t he reach out to me?” “We both were laughing and joking throughout the night.” “He should have opened up.”

“If you have suicide. Speak up!” It is easy to say. Why should they speak up? Will you understand their predicament? How safe have you made yourself for those depressed and suicidal people to lean on. To share? No, instead you put hot waters on them. You brush them off with silly motivational talks, after all everybody get problem.

Therapy. Kind words. More kind words. Can help a suicidial person. Giving a little of your time. Offering kind words and providing a safe haven can help a suicidal person.

When we make helping our fellow humans our business, spreading love and kind words. Showing we actually care. We can make this world a little better. Leave a person, a little happier. What are we living for other than raise a helping hand to those in need, feel the pains of others.

P. S. The happiest of people in the world, are the most depressed people with suicidal thoughts.

https://images.app.goo.gl/8vB1RZYUd9J6thPj8 image from WHO

How to help Someone who is suicidal.

From Psych2go video: How to help Someone who is suicidal.

Talking about suicide reduces suicidal tendencies in someone who is planning to commit one. If you have a friend/loved one contemplating on suicide, it is best you discuss SUICIDE with them. They do not have to reach out to you for help before you render one.

Signs a friend might be suicidal

1. Comments of killing oneself.
2. Social withdrawal and sudden mood swing.
3. Increase on the intake of Alcohol and drugs substances.
4. Dramatic mood swings.
5. Talking or writing about death ☠.
6. Impulsive or reckless behaviour.
7. Aggressiveness.
8.They might express their feelings of having no reason to go on living.
9. They may start giving items away.
10. They may have discussed suicide in the past as a way out.

NOT PSYCH2GO POINT: A friend passing a ‘joke’ about killing themselves IS A SIGN OF SUICIDE.

If you have a mere gut feeling about a friend, DO NOT HESTITATE to reach out. Don’t wait for them to come to you. They may be desperate for someone to turn to but do not know how to seek help.

Asking them and discussing about suicidial ideation isn’t more likely for them to go through with it. Ask them questions like, ‘are you thinking about suicide?’ It shows you are not judgemental about it and open to the topic. LISTEN to their feelings.

Learn psychological first aid using the RAPID model.

RAPID

Reflective listening
Assessment of needs
Prioritisation
Intervention
Disposition


The RAPID model is applicable everywhere especially when dealing with the aftermath of accidents and traumatising incidents.

Keep them safe and remove harmful items. After requiring if they are suicidal. Ask them if they have done something to try to kill themselves. Do they know how they would do it? Do they have a plan?

Find these answers out and know whether it is an emergency that needs additional help (professional please). If they appear to be in immediate danger, remove every harmful items out of the room and far away from them as possible. These may include; sharp objects such as knives, drugs, cleaning products, ANY wire, cords or rope.

ACKNOWLEDGE their feelings are LEGITIMATE. Never say things like, ‘just be happy’ or ‘(you will) snap out of it’.
It is a bad idea to suggest an easy solution as the individual may get defensive or feel rejected, unheard or guilty (all these listed here are triggers to depression and suicide).

Repeat THEIR words (not your words) back to them in your own way. These help show them that you are actively listening to them.

Emphasise with them. Show empathy. You should express these by saying, ‘I may not know exactly what you are going through or the pain that you are experiencing but I want to try to understand.’

Encourage them to focus on getting through TODAY. Encourage them to focus on getting through the day. Not some complicated mess which could be our future. Nobody knows what’s in store for them. Our lives can go from unfortunate to lucky in an instant.

Identify a hook. What’s important to this person? What holds meaning and values in their life? A passion. A pet. A family. A job they enjoy.

It is a bad idea to make them feel guilty due to any pain or damage suicide may cost for their love ones. The goal is to remind them what they value and make them feel better.

Mention their strengths. Look them in the eyes and mention things such as, ‘I know we will get through this’

Don’t mininise their problems or compare them to others in a negative way. Just because you find it easy to continue forward, doesn’t mean they do.

Help them develop a safety plan. A safety plan is always a good idea once things deescalate. A crisis plan is used to help an individual when suicidal thoughts return or when they are in their crisis.

Things to include in a crisis plan
1. Do not be alone.
2. Removing certain objects in the house.
3. Talking to a helpline. A loved one or professional.
4. Distraction techniques such as getting lost in a good book or writing in a journal. Or putting on a favourite film or TV show.

If need to get out, go to a museum. Or visit someone you know.

Follow up to see how they are doing. Try not to make impossible promises or skip a planned meeting.

To every suicidal person, it isn’t easy but bit by bit, we shall get there. To the brighter side of life.

© Psych2go W

Watch video via the link https://youtu.be/B7dKgg4Z9tg?si=kW0k3T7jJ1E6FgEf

There was a boyfriend of mine who wanted to commit suicide. Everyday, he would tell me about it. I tried encouraging him and I reminded him of the pains his mum would go through (I had no knowledge of how to help a suicidal someone till yesterday). It helped. But then, I withdrew my feelings for I felt, he didn’t love me. If he did, he won’t contemplate suicide.